The Ghost of College Past

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From the time we start school till the time we finish high school, the idea of going to college is engrained in our brains. We’re told, if you want to make something of yourself and your life you must attend college. Sadly, that’s almost always the truth.

Now a days it’s nearly impossible to get a job without a college degree. Without the ability to get a job how are we supposed to pay our insane tuition? The two go hand in hand.

As a high school junior, this is the year where the preparation for college truly begins. Taking the SAT and ACT, making sure your grades are at their peak, getting all that community service and choosing what you want to do with your life. It’s a little unfair that we can’t even legally make decisions for ourselves yet we’re supposed to pick what we want to do with the rest of our lives at 17.

College has always been a priority, but now that my departure to a 4 year university is creeping up, the whole process is becoming pretty scary and overwhelming. First off, I don’t even know what I want to do for sure yet. Secondly, looking at colleges those numbers are pretty terrifying. My mom is a single mother and my dad isn’t a part of my life, so the idea of paying for college is one of the daunting thoughts in my mind. I constantly wonder how I’m going to afford it and although I try my best not to narrow my school selection down based on pricing…I can’t help it. I know, no matter what I’m leaving college with mounds of debt…but why?

College is expected of today’s youth yet it costs hundreds of thousands of dollars and most can’t afford it. That just seems a little messed up. Maybe if college was more affordable, we would have more people graduating and attending. Yes, there are scholarships but that doesn’t cover all of it, unless you get a full ride, which is extremely difficult.

Lucky for me, I’m currently getting a year and a half of free college education due to the program I’m in. I do Middle College, which is basically me finishing high school while earning college credits as a full time SBCC student. It’s an amazing program and looking at tuition prices, I’m so grateful to be getting free college education right now. What’s neat about this program is, if I work my ass off for the next year I can graduate with most of my general ed’s for college so I can apply as a transfer student and hopefully only do 2 years at a 4 year university.

College man, it’s a pretty scary thing. There’s so much pressure on you your last 2 years of high school…it’s nuts.

The New Side

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There comes a day in everyones life when everything changes, for many graduating high school and heading to college is that time. In my case, I opted to jump into college halfway through my junior year.

I’m confident that I can do well in college but it’s a whole new world. A college desk is no different than a high school desk and you still feel like the “new kid” walking around, it’s a strange place to be at 17. Walking around campus yesterday I started to become nostalgic, missing high school, my friends and that feeling of belonging. What’s ironic is that I hated high school and wanted out so badly but suddenly when I got my chance and it all began, I started to wonder if I made the right choice.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so stressed in my life. Trying to crash 3 different English classes and not being able to get into any, struggling to figure out a schedule that will work and having to do all my homework and work on top of that…it’s a lot. I’ve always wanted to be an “adult” and be treated like one…it’s finally starting to happen and it’s not as fun as one would think. I’m trying to take a step back from it all and relax, allow myself to realize it’s all out of my control but it’s so hard to let go of the reigns when it feels like your future is on the line.